When you take your vows as a military spouse, they should add “and anywhere in the world” after the “for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer” part. Moves are an integral part of the military lifestyle, and while there is support and lots of resources out there, nothing can quite prepare you for the resilience, patience and humor you’ll need to move to the other side of the world.
We have been living in Guam for a year now, but I, like almost everyone I’ve talked to, initially had very little idea where Guam was. I had very little idea what starting over on a small island in the middle of the Pacific would look like. I knew I had my best friend with me and that, at least, was a start.
I spent hours watching videos, reading blog posts, scouring housing websites, and applying for teaching jobs, doing my best to hit the ground running and make our first OCONUS duty station feel like home. I had never lived more than a short flight or feasible drive away from my family, and I was leaving behind a solid job, a close-knit community, a region I had come to know and love well, and the sense of comfort, confidence, and security I had built from developing a network over the years. Transitioning to spending two years somewhere that most people can’t find on a map was nothing short of anxiety-inducing and there were days before, during, and after the move that I cried with frustration, uncertainty, and, most of all, homesickness.
Despite the stress, or perhaps because of it, I began to grow. I could not rely on the network I knew and loved, so I had to step up to the plate to become the problem solver, the fixer, the crisis manager. I found a job that challenged me every day but fulfilled me and pushed me to develop more as an educator in new ways. We found a house, cars and created new routines. We learned to anticipate and brace for new kinds of weather and to embrace and love the beauty of the beaches, palm trees and tropical flowers. We found friends that invited us to barbecues and birthday parties. I found places to volunteer and to meaningfully spend my time.
I have grown accustomed to the geckos that love to live in our shower and the carabao and wild pigs that you can spot on the sides of the road. I will never get used to the spiders the size of my hand, the seven-foot-long snakes or the monitor lizards. I have experienced earthquakes, a tsunami advisory and typhoon season. I have also seen brilliant sunsets that take your breath away, rainbows that look like hope and butterflies that spark joy.
There have been lonely nights and nights filled with such fun and fellowship that they stretch on for hours. There have been days when the distance between us and home feels enormous and days where video calls feel like they can bridge the gap. Both realities are true. I wish I could show the Katie of a year ago that it gets better, that it will all work out, that I’m stronger than I know. I’ll shout it for you too as you unpack your moving boxes for the first, fifth or final time. I’ll shout it for you as you search for jobs, friends and community. I’ll shout it for you as you get in your car or board that plane. I promise you, you got this.
Katie McDonald is a Navy wife, writer, and former English teacher. She reads voraciously, enjoys volunteering, loves to bake, and looks forward to weekly trivia nights with friends. Katie writes book reviews and travel recommendations on her blog, Katie Reads.
Blog Brigade unites military spouses by creating a community built on shared experiences and mutual support. Navigating the complexities of military life can be challenging, but you don’t have to do it alone. Military OneSource offers valuable resources focused on well-being, readiness, and connection. Explore a range of moving resources and tools tailored to your needs.
