Rows of backpacks with tags attached, organized for distribution.

Back-to-School for Military Teens

Written By Lizann Lightfoot

My military kids didn’t mind changing schools when they were little. It meant new friends, fresh playgrounds, fun adventures. But once they hit middle school, that all changed. After multiple PCS moves with five kids, I’ve seen how much harder the transition becomes once they reach middle and high school. Fewer on-base school options mean most teens attend off-base public schools. Joining sports teams or finding a solid friend group takes more effort, and fighting for education continuity — especially with IEPs and credit transfers across state lines — can feel like a full-time job for their parents. These years are already emotionally intense. Adding frequent moves makes them even tougher. But with the right support and proactive steps, you can help your teens start the year feeling more secure and connected.

One of the biggest frustrations for many military teens going into a new middle school or high school is the loss of continuity. What counted as an honors class or required credit in one state might not line up in another. IEPs that worked perfectly at the last school can suddenly need re-evaluation, leaving gaps in services. This is where two key resources become essential: your installation’s School Liaison Program and the Military Interstate Children’s Compact Commission.

School liaisons are your strongest advocate during a PCS. They understand military life and can connect you with the new school district before you even arrive. Contact your current school liaison as soon as you have orders. They can reach out to the liaison at your next installation to help with school selection, credit transfers, class registration and placement. Many liaisons also provide information about extracurricular programs and can make introductions to help your teen get involved in sports or clubs quickly. Don’t wait until after you move. Starting these conversations early can prevent weeks of stress.

Lizann’s smiling son holding a "First Day of School" sign while seated at a desk with a laptop.

MIC3, the Interstate Compact, exists specifically to protect military kids from being penalized by frequent moves. All 50 states and the District of Columbia participate. It helps with enrollment, placement and graduation requirements. For teens with IEPs or 504 plans, the compact requires the new school to provide comparable services until they can complete a new evaluation. For credits and graduation, it can help waive certain local requirements or find alternative ways for your child to meet standards if they move during junior or senior year. Familiarize yourself with MIC3’s parent guide and bring it to meetings with school counselors. Having this information ready shows you know your rights and helps move things along faster.

Lizann’s daughter playing a violin in a living room.

Social and extracurricular challenges hit teens especially hard. They’re at an age where friendships and belonging matter deeply, yet they’re often the “new kid” right before homecoming, prom or sports tryouts. Many teens hesitate to put themselves out there because they know another move could be coming. Encourage your teen to join at least one activity early — whether it’s a club, theater, band or sports team. Even if they don’t make varsity, being part of something helps them find their people. Some schools have Student 2 Student programs specifically designed to welcome military-connected students.

Open, honest family conversations make a big difference. Acknowledge that this move is hard. Let your teen express frustration about leaving friends or starting over without jumping straight to “You’ll make new ones.” Share your own feelings about the move too, because it models healthy emotional processing. Consider a family tradition of “rose, thorn and bud” conversations at dinner: one good thing, one hard thing and one thing we’re looking forward to. It creates space for real talk without forcing positivity.

Practical tips that helped our family:

  • Visit the new school together before classes start if possible.
  • Ask for a campus tour and introductions to key staff.
  • Get copies of your teen’s transcripts, test scores and current IEP/504 plan organized in a digital folder.
  • Reach out to coaches or club advisors in advance with a short email introducing your child and their experience.
  • Connect with other military families at the new base. Many have teens who’ve been through the same thing and can offer advice or friendship.

Military OneSource can also support you through this transition. Their consultants can provide guidance on talking with schools and emotional support for both you and your teen.

Raising military teens means watching them develop incredible resilience while also protecting them from unnecessary hardship. By advocating through school liaisons and MIC3, supporting their social efforts, and keeping communication open, you help them build confidence despite the moves.

This school year won’t be perfect, but it can still be meaningful. Your teen is stronger than they realize, and so are you. With preparation and support, they can walk into this new chapter feeling seen, supported and ready to grow.

Blog Brigade unites military spouses by creating a community built on shared experiences and mutual support. Navigating the complexities of military life can be challenging, but you don’t have to do it alone. Military OneSource offers valuable resources focused on well-being, readiness, and connection. Explore a range of parenting resources and tools tailored to your needs.

Group photo in front of the San Diego Zoo entrance and lion statue.

Best Friends for Life

Written By Lauren Hagee Glintz

I recently received a text from my friend, Eileen, who I hadn’t spoken to in a while. “Hey! I hope you’re doing well,” she texted. “I feel weird sending this out of the blue, but I thought you’d be interested.” She then provided the juiciest gossip about our former coworker. I couldn’t respond fast enough. “OMG,” I quickly typed, “Don’t feel weird sending me the most fascinating thing I’ve seen in a month! You can text me anytime and I’d love it, but this is particularly good!”

Lauren and bridesmaids posing under a floral arch beside a lake.

After my PCS move four years earlier, Eileen and I were no longer in a regular texting habit, but I was genuinely thrilled to see her name pop up on my phone. The reality is, I never stop loving my friends, even after one of us moves away.

PCS moves make this happen far more often than I’d like. I have to say goodbye to friends I love and who love me — people who shared my confidences, made me laugh, supported me and were central to my life. I am never ready to let go of them, and, frankly, I just won’t. We might not live close, but I will do my best to stay close.

My first line of friendship defense is, of course, texting and social media. I will text, like, comment and send memes with no hesitation to any friend, no matter how long it’s been since we last communicated. I know my reaction when I receive a meme from a friend: I love that something reminded them of me; I love that they thought to hit send, and I love the opportunity to connect even if only for a few seconds. I’ve decided to go through my life assuming all my friends feel the same, so I hit send with no self-consciousness. At least they know I thought of them.

I also believe in being an active group-text participant. One of my group chats, “MomTalk,” is a subset of a larger group: just those of us with young kids. We met in DC, but now we’re texting from DC, New Jersey, Illinois and North Carolina, laughing and commiserating about early motherhood. Today, I texted them a picture of my toilet with a big lizard hanging out in it. Although none of them could come to my actual aid, their reactions were funny (“Did your son try to keep it?”), and their support gave me the bravery to rescue the potty lizard. I didn’t feel quite so alone in that weird moment.

Small lizard inside a toilet bowl in a bathroom.

My true secret weapon, when it comes to keeping in touch, is the 20-minute phone call. Sometimes when a friend calls, I feel overwhelmed because I don’t have 90 minutes for a massive catch-up. But I started calling my sisters while driving to pick up my son from his pre-K, about 18 minutes from our house. The phone calls were perfect. The natural time limit took out the pressure to fully catch up, and we could just talk.

Then, in one of my larger group chats, a friend joked that they never needed the actual phone app. I responded that I make lots of calls because what do they expect me to do during pre-K drop-off and pickup? Sit with my own thoughts? I then jokingly sent my driving schedule and offered slots if anyone wanted to talk to me for 20 minutes. To my surprise, a friend I’d never been on personal call terms with took me up on it and claimed the next slot. When the day came, I called him as scheduled during my drive to pre-K. For 20 minutes, we chatted easily and laughed about the idiosyncrasies of our respective in-laws and discovered a shared love of 2010s indie music. It was fun, and I truly felt closer to him by the end of the call.

I won’t pretend that friendships stay the same following a PCS move, but they definitely do not end. Staying in touch can feel overwhelming, but I’ve found the reality is much simpler. A text takes a few seconds. A quick car ride can be a fun call. And friendship can be forever.

Blog Brigade unites military spouses by creating a community built on shared experiences and mutual support. Navigating the complexities of military life can be challenging, but you don’t have to do it alone. Military OneSource offers valuable resources focused on well-being, readiness, and connection. Explore a range of resources and tools tailored to your needs.

Person writing in a notebook beside a laptop, coffee cup, and glasses on a wooden desk, viewed from above.

How Constant Change Shaped the Life I Didn’t Know I Was Building

Written By

For years, my life felt like a series of starts and stops. Just when I began to find my rhythm, something would change. A new duty station, a deployment, or a season where my family needed more from me than anything else.

So, I adapted.

During quieter times, I picked up work where I could. I taught English remotely early in the mornings, took on data entry projects, and said yes to temporary roles that fit into the small pockets of time I had available. These jobs weren’t always long-term, and they didn’t always connect, but they worked for the life I was living.

And when work didn’t fit, I found other ways to show up. I volunteered with the unit, in my children’s school, and within our local community. I stepped into whatever was needed, even when it didn’t look like progress on paper.

Then, just as things started to feel steady, I would step away again.

I remember one season clearly. My husband was preparing for a deployment, and everything at home shifted. The routines, the emotions, the weight of holding things together. Work became something I quietly set down without question, because I knew where I was needed most.

At the time, it felt like I was constantly falling behind. Like everyone else was building something stable, and I was just trying to keep up.

Looking back, I can see that none of it was wasted.

Every job, every volunteer role, every season of starting over was teaching me something. I learned how to step into unfamiliar environments and figure things out quickly. I learned how to support others without needing recognition. I learned how to stay organized and keep things moving, even when life felt anything but steady.

More than anything, I learned how to adapt. I learned how to hold structure where I could and let go where I needed to. I learned how to manage multiple responsibilities while still being present for my family. I learned how to keep going, even when there wasn’t a clear path in front of me.

At the time, it didn’t feel like I was building anything. It just felt like doing what needed to be done.

Over time, those experiences began to come together. Not all at once, but slowly. I started to notice patterns in what I was naturally drawn to. The behind-the-scenes work. The organizing, the problem-solving, the steady presence in the middle of things that felt overwhelming.

What once felt scattered started to feel connected.

The jobs that didn’t last. The volunteer roles that didn’t come with a title. The seasons where my focus shifted completely to my family. They were all part of something. I just couldn’t see it yet.

Military life doesn’t always allow for a traditional path. It asks you to pause when you don’t want to, to pivot when you feel settled, and to choose your family over and over again. For a long time, I saw that as something that set me back.

Now, I see it differently.

It shaped me in ways a straight path never could. It taught me resilience, patience, and flexibility. It taught me how to build a life that works in the middle of change, not just when things feel stable.

If you’re in a season where things feel disconnected or uncertain, I want you to know this: there is purpose in it, even if you can’t see it yet.

The job that only lasted a few months, the volunteer role you said yes to, the season where everything shifted and your plans had to wait. It all matters.

You are learning. You are growing. You are building something that may not make sense right now but will one day.

I used to think I needed a clear plan for my life to come together. Now I know that sometimes it comes together in the looking back, in seeing how each season, each role, each unexpected turn shaped you into who you needed to become.

Military life didn’t give me a straight path, but it gave me something deeper. It gave me perspective, strength, and a quiet appreciation for every step that brought me here, even the ones that didn’t make sense at the time.

Michelle is an operations strategist and military spouse who built her career through years of adapting to the unpredictable rhythm of military life. With a background shaped by remote work, community involvement, and constant transition, she brings a grounded perspective on creating structure in uncertain seasons. Her work centers on helping others navigate the “in-between” with clarity and intention. Michelle is passionate about sharing honest reflections that remind others their path still holds purpose, even when it doesn’t look the way they expected.

Blog Brigade unites military spouses by creating a community built on shared experiences and mutual support. Navigating the complexities of military life can be challenging, but you don’t have to do it alone. Military OneSource offers valuable resources focused on well-being, readiness and connection. Explore a range of spouse resources and tools tailored to your needs.

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